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Being In a Bar Don't Give You the Right to Be Drunk
03.23.06 (3:54 pm)   [edit]
Some Texans have clearly lost their mind. A recent story in Reuters reports:

Texas has begun sending undercover agents into bars to arrest drinkers for being drunk, a spokeswoman for the Texas Alcoholic Beverage Commission said on Wednesday.

[...]

Being in a bar does not exempt one from the state laws against public drunkeness, Beck said.

The goal, she said, was to detain drunks before they leave a bar and go do something dangerous like drive a car.


If Wisconsin police decided to start behaving like that, the jails in Madison would overflow! College students fill up Madison bars and get pissy drunk every weekend.

Since when is it legal to arrest someone because you think they will go do something dangerous? Beck argues that being drunk in a bar is considered public drunkeness. I'm not sure I agree with that. Are bars public or private property? It's my idea that unless the bar is owned by the city, it's private property.

Madison, WI has banned smoking in all restaurants and bars; patrons have to smoke outside if they wanna light up. Again, are bars and restaurants public property? I don't smoke and I certainly don't mind the smoking ban, but I wonder just how far police and lawmakers will go.

Is Beck's approach the best way to end drunk driving? No. Drinkers will simply stay home and drink. Will she camp outside liquor stores and arrest people because she thinks they will go home, get pissy drunk, then get behind the wheel? Probably. She's from Texas!

| # | General | , , , , , , , . Word of the Day paterfamilias
 
The L Word 3.11 -- What an Odd Way to Deal With Race
03.22.06 (12:37 am)   [edit]
I've been complaining about The L Word avoiding issues of race, so you would think I would be delighted with episode 11. I'm not sure how I feel yet. Perhaps by the time I complete this post, I'll know.

Dana died on episode 10 (no SistersTalk review available). Dana's family arranged a very stuffy memorial service in which the reverend went on and on about how he was sure Dana would have found a loving husband had she lived long enough. That pissed Alice off, who stood up and announced that Dana was gay. All of Dana's gay friends were shunned by Dana's family, so Alice stole Dana's ashes (in typical Alice-fashion) and decided that the gang would give her a proper burial -- one that Dana would have liked.

Dylan drops off a video tape, the check that Helena wrote her (the settlement from her phoney sexual harassment lawsuit), and what appears to be all of the associated legal papers. Helena watches Dylan tearfully apologize and confess how she really feels about Helena. I'd be done with that one for good, if I were Helena.

Bette visits an attorney, the same attorney Tina used in Season 2 when she was thinking of "divorcing" Bette. Let's hear it for the dysfunctional lesbians! Bette discusses suing for sole legal custody of baby Angelica. And get this: her reason for wanting custody is supposedly Angelica's race! Now, let's see. I can count on one hand (and I don't even need the whole hand) how many times Bette's race has been discussed on the show -- by Bette or anyone else. It seems like really bad form for a biracial lesbian who can pass for something-other-than-Blac k, who rarely (if ever) addressed racism before, and seems pretty privileged to me, would suddenly want to play the race card so she can take a child from her birth mother. I'm wondering what message the show's writers are sending with that particular storyline. Perhaps the writers are thumbing their noses at those of us who've been bitching for a race storyline. We wanted one and we got it, but it's a really bad way to handle it. Kinda like making Tina a bisexual right after she has a baby (and is probably suffering from post-partum depression) is a really bad way to handle the bisexuality subject.

Moving on (and I'll circle back to the race issue) to more dysfunction:

Shane proposes to Carmen. Like those two are ready for marriage!

Add one more girl to the incestuous circle goin' on with Dana/Alice/Bette (Alice slept with Bette and Dana). It seems Jenny had really bad sex with Dana once! I'd laugh, but I know that kinda thing really does happen in the lesbian community (bad sex and incestuous relationships). To top it all off, we see Alice and Lara kiss in the final scene. Dear lord. I understand they're both grieving, but give me a break. WHAT exactly are the writers doing? Turning this show into a really bad soap opera?

Max gets a job at the same place Moira was turned down. It's interesting to see how the writers are dealing with gender as it relates to sexism.

One of the SistersTalk readers said, "i was disgusted with the image of the black woman in the glass cage. she didnt have a voice, and she was there for the pleasure of an all white audience." I agree completely -- except, I think the writers really want us to see Kit and Bette as Black women, so the entire audience was not white. Kit was there. And that woman was definitely Black. Choosing a Black actress who had full lips (exaggerated quite a bit by dark lipstick) and a shaved head (did it remind you of those women you see in documentaries about Africa?), then presenting her completely nude (again, did it remind you of those documentaries you see about Africa?) was definitely giving the bitchin' Black viewers what they asked for -- a full-blooded Black woman. Next season, I expect to see a tribal dance or two!

I have to take a deep breath here and give The L Word some credit for what it has accomplished so far. The show has opened much-needed dialogue in the lesbian (and bisexual) community. Sure, many of those conversations were taking place long before The L Word. Heated debates about butch/femme dynamics, class, lesbianism vs. bisexuality, transgender issues, and even race have been going on for some time; however, the show gives us a target for our anger. Most of the time, we're just angry with each other. For those lesbians who are living in a broom closet somewhere, the show has introduced them to issues they may not have even known existed in our community. I don't expect the writers to ever please all women who identify as lesbian, bisexual, butch, femme, or transgendered; as a group, we're much too diverse for that to ever happen.

What I would like to see next season: more Alexandra Hedison!

| # | The L Word | , , , , , , ,. Word of the Day aubade

 
The Women We Love
03.21.06 (8:13 pm)   [edit]
I won't even tell ya what bothers me about this list and this list and this list and this list and . . . . Yes, the list is quite beautiful. But dayum ladies, don't you find women who have dark skin attractive at all?

At least Angelina Jolie isn't dominating the list. Could it be the whole broken marriage thing she was involved in?

Sidenote: I've written articles about my disappointment with The L Word and had them published on that site -- only to have them all receive very poor ratings. Check out their "Women We Love" series and you'll see why!

| # | General | , , , , , , , , , , , , . Word of the Day aubade

 
Liberal Men Are Better in Bed
03.21.06 (7:13 pm)   [edit]
What an ironic thing to see: a post about Liberal men -- and their performance in bed -- posted on a lesbian blog. Who said this blog wasn't inclusive?!

Hat tip: Feministing.com

The Donkey in the Bedroom
An anonymous GQ writer has composed 10 reasons why Republicans are the best party in bed. I beg to differ:

10 REASONS WHY LIBERAL MEN ARE BETTER IN BED

1. Conscience! A liberal man knows it’s not all about him. His getting off is contingent on yours. You don’t have to make him pancakes to get him to go down on you.

2. Tears! Liberal men cry— just not during sex. They acknowledge that there are some things worth getting weepy about, such as everything the federal government has done in the past six years.

3. A sense of perspective. A good liberal man realizes that what goes on in politics does have an impact on what goes on in the bedroom. (Even though you don’t have to talk about it in bed.) This is in stark contrast to the Republican man, who can’t understand how his support for anti-choice politicians could possibly impact your sex life. While it may have been fun to sit on a Republican man the night before, it’s his fault you’ll have a hard time getting your Plan B prescription filled the next day.

4. A sense of humor. Republican men may laugh at jokes, but liberal men are better at making jokes. Case in point: Jon Stewart. They didn’t ask a conservative comedian to host the Academy Awards. (Are there any conservative comedians?)

5. Foreplay. Liberal men are so intellectually sexy that everything is foreplay. Republicans might get started in the cab after dinner, but the liberal man’s in-depth knowledge of (and vehement opposition to) various state-level abortion restrictions has got me all hot and bothered before we’ve ordered our entrees.

6. Size. It is absolutely, positively, 100 percent true that Republicans are bigger dicks who trigger the gag reflex. [I love this one!]

7. Efficiency. See #5.

8. Largesse. Liberal men will never drag you to a restaurant you don’t like, order your meal for you, and then leave a terrible tip. If they do pay for your dinner, they’ll never demand a blow job in return. (But they were such great conversationalists at dinner, you’ll probably be into fellatio, anyway.)

9. Wooing techniques. Liberal men do indeed send emails and text messages that say things like "I can’t wait to eat your pussy." Unlike Republicans, they actually mean it.

10. Nightstand reading. You will never find a Republican reading She Comes First. Liberal men understand you want to be with someone who knows how to find your clit.

Note how The Elephant in the Bedroom -- the story about Republicans being better in bed, starts out with the declaration that Democrats are "better human beings in general." I suppose if that woman (an anonymous writer -- ha!) just wants to be fucked like a nasty whore, she might want to work on her communication skills with the Democrats. Writing such an interesting story under the guise of anonymity tells me that she has a few communication issues in the bedroom.

| # | Sex & Sexuality | , , , , . Word of the Day aubade

 
I Hate to Say No to the Little Christians
03.21.06 (4:47 pm)   [edit]
It's fundraising time for local Christian schools in my area. Cute little girls wearing pretty pink dresses (or shirts) are going around asking people here at work to buy candles, candy, popcorn, and whatever else you can imagine. I hate to tell these little girls "no," but I must.

A couple of years ago, I tried enrolling my children in a local Christian school (Rock County Christian) and the Administrator told me my children wouldn't be allowed to attend because I'm a lesbian. It didn't matter that their Dad is a married, bible-bangin' heterosexual; I'm a sinnin' homosexual, so the answer was "no."

Before I tried enrolling my kids in that school, I often bought items from them during their annual yard sale. I felt betrayed when I learned my children weren't good enough for their school, but they took my cash for many years without ever warning me they had somethin' against homosexuals! There should have been a sign at the check-out table that said, "if you're a homo, we don't want your money." I never saw any such sign.

It's unfortunate that students who attend this private school -- a school that relies heavily on fundraising dollars -- should have to suffer because Administrators don't want homosexuals among them. But . . . oh well! Many of my friends have stopped spending their money at their yard sales and fundraising events also.

She gave a great speech though. She walked confidently over to my desk, introduced herself, gave a little speech, and said she was from Rock County Christian.

"Do you want to buy a candle," she said, as she pulled a candle from her pink satchel.

"What school did you say you were from?" I asked, to make sure I didn't misunderstand her.

"Rock County Christian," she repeated.

"No thank you, hunny."

"Thank you," she said. She smiled and walked away.

I overheard her repeat her coached speech to one of my co-workers. Success! He bought one. He's just a sucker for little kids selling people things they really don't need.

Update: 3/21/06, 7:45pm The Fraternal Order of the Police just called asking for a donation. I said, "the police can kiss my ass." I don't know why they call me every year and listen to my foul mouth!

| # | Religion | , , , , , , , , . Word of the Day aubade

 
Bloggin' Just Ain't What It Used to Be
03.20.06 (2:05 am)   [edit]
I've received several emails from SistersTalk readers questioning (a) where I've been, (b) what I'm doing, and (c) if I plan to get back to bloggin'.

I've been right here in good ol' Beloit, WI. I've been working at my "real" job and getting really caught up in the rat race. Yes, I plan to get back to bloggin, but it just ain't what it used to be.

My ankle is healing quite nicely and the pain has almost disappeared. If I walk on it too much (which I'm not supposed to be doing at all), then it hurts somethin' fierce by the time I get to bed. Thanks for all your well-wishes. You should see the metal plate doctors placed in my ankle. On the x-ray, it looks a lot like a large door hinge.

About this bloggin' thang:

I've been reading lots of blogs even though I wasn't posting here. I read a story about blogging wars (sorry, can't find the link right now) and it got me to thinking. It's kinda hard to decide which bloggers are passionate about their work and which bloggers just do it for name recognition. I read bloggers who bash MSM, but for some reason, they don't see that their work is starting to look a lot like what MSM used to be. I say "used to be" because blogging has changed the way the media reports and responds to the news. Once upon a time, I never saw links to additional sources in a news story. Now, online newspapers are offering additional sources quite regularly. That's a habit bloggers started. Bloggers are even influencing what is or is not considered news. Wasn't that job once a MSM duty?

Anyway, I love blogging. But I enjoy it because, as a Black female who has limited representation in the media, I finally get a voice. I can make my voice as loud as I want it to be. I have many readers who absolutely HATE my comments about The L Word's lack of diverse representation. I could care less if they hate what I have to say; I'll keep sayin' it as much as I please. I see the lack of diversity and I won't ignore it. It's those of us who bitch-with-a-megaphone who change the world. The quiet ones simply sit back and shamelessly enjoy the benefits of our work.

| # | Blogging | , , , , , , , . Word of the Day dudgeon
 
A Season of Grief
03.03.06 (4:14 pm)   [edit]
Author Bill Valentine's A Season of Grief will make you long for the day you finally meet your soulmate. If you have that special person in your life already, you'll want to start writing everything down so you have memoirs to share with others once your loved one passes. This simple, and often very intimate, story of Bill and Joe's life made me laugh (and cry) over and over again.

A Season of Grief tells the story of Joe Lopes, a handsome flight attendant -- who could never be a pilot because he hated hat hair -- and his 21-year relationship with Bill Valentine. Joe died in a plane crash shortly after 9/11, leaving Bill behind to not only grieve the loss of his soulmate, but to celebrate all the wonderful people and events they shared.

As readers turn the pages of this beautiful love story, they learn that marriage rights should be afforded to all people -- regardless of their sexual orientation. If you've ever loved, fought, cried, and made love to your partner with even the tiniest bit of passion, you'll recognize yourself as you flip through the pages of A Season of Grief.

Meet Bill and Joe's family; shamelessly devour the book's love scenes; and enjoy meeting Joe Lopes through Bill Valentine's eyes.

| # | LGBT Issues | , , , , , , , . Word of the Day dilettante